Rolling with the punches is a lot more difficult when the boxing match never seemingly ends.

Gotta utilize that big brain energy to make it through those more trying times of need

This mood that haunts me will not abate, and as a result, I am in more ways paralyzed than I care to admit. Strangely functional, though robbed entirely of concerted drive and focused effort. Wandering through the everyday as if a stranger in my own skin. I attempt not to dwell on these notions too much, lest it drive me mad, proper. Existential dread tends to put to shame most of the other big bads of the every day, and the boogeyman wishes he had that kind of job satisfaction. This current scenario is a great example as to why hope is more times than not, poison in disguise; a deadly concoction that possesses an unbeatable high that makes the more lucid of us miss the moments of feeling like hanging off the side of a cliff, instead of already feeling splattered on the rocks below.

You’d think sitting on a couch to play video games would be such an easy task; you’d be wrong, the pretense of which seems as absurd as it does tragic on some level. The whole notion of writing about video games starts to fall apart when one doesn’t play them, the recon process vital in gathering experience that one can dictate from. To this point, I was crossing my fingers I would find the energy deep within to get further in the Silent Hill 2 Remake (SH2R) today, as what is a 10 hour game should not be taking me several weeks to plow through. Taking my sweet time to work through Silksong made sense: ’tis a difficult endeavor, after all. I know my way around Silent Hill, even in a newer version of a game I’ve yet to be totally acquainted with, it’s a far more linear process, and when one is able to master fear, a lot of the rest of the experience tends to figure itself out.

Seeing IGN’s list of top 10 survival horror games of all time makes sense to me on some level. Not that I ever really enjoy such a reductionist approach to game analysis, but I can’t expect a whole lot of nuance in an industry that is largely predicated on unlock codes obtained from Mountain Dew bottles and Doritos bags. Still, their top two spots were awarded to the SH2R and the Resident Evil 2 Remake, so perhaps some truth value involved yet. I had posited similar notions recently, too, though the direct antagonism involved with pitting the two series against each other was a moment of low hanging fruit for me…at least in terms of creative posturing is concerned. People tend to like vs fights, however, and one has to frame these things in some relatable fashion.

Of course, the list gave me some fat to chew on, as I considered what does make for good survival horror, something I’ve been mulling over this month. I was debating with myself if some form of a combat system one can “master” fundamentally empowers the individual too much, but I think just based on the negative pushback so many gamers have against the survival horror games which essentially lack a combat system entirely, leads me to believe it is a no sale if you take complete aggressive agency away from the player…it is the tug of war between oppression and finding ways to effectively fight back against the system which helps to contrast both elements in more satisfying manners.

And yes, I think contrast is a good ideal when feeling out the qualities required for the successful makeup of a survival horror experience, as the give and take of abundance and a lack of it, is such an easily translatable message with which to communicate with just about everyone: pain and despair being universal languages. That power dynamic is essential in maintaining an ideal sense of tension balancing, something that even extends beyond the survival horror realm, as I’ve touched on before. Though, keeping the player in love with the feelings involved with the subtle romance of the knife’s edge is key in building a stable relationship connected to a credible threat; let them feel the sting of the blade but once, by proxy even, and that phantom pain imagined in their brain will torment them more then the actual moment the torture may never in fact be exacted upon them, the ever constant cooing that comes from endlessly flirting with disaster.

Survival horror may just function best when the carrot and stick fundamentals are operating within peak efficiency levels: keeping them hooked for the reward right out of reach, as they have the feeling of hell biting at the ankles, this is when everything is utopic within the dimensions of any nightmare actualized. This sense of restrained empowerment still keeps to the rules involved with what makes up the beating heart of game design, the players desires residing just beyond reach in the realm of satisfaction, the power fantasy not yet realized within the machinations of survival horror is just one of a more restrained sensibility, tempered by terrifying moderation.

The other greatest element at play is catharsis, being able to let the player also savor what may eventually be a sweet revenge exacted on the monster under the bed, helping to make the eventual bed rotting give way to a well earned slumber, and I think many of these elements are shared and magnified quite effortlessly by both the SH2R and the RE2R, and what makes them worthy of the praise they garner so fervently within the field.

There remains more to this line of thinking, but much like yesterday, being able to remain vertical for any length of time, in the course of a day where quite simply, I would prefer not to, is a marvelous feat all on its own, this is without mentioning finding the energy to write an article, and a job that demands my attention.

May you find more peace than I have recently.

-Pashford